The Wrong Type of Redemption

27 Sunset


27: Sunset

Realizing he wouldn’t be able to concentrate on his work with his father in the apartment with him, Jerry grabbed everything he needed, packed it in his backpack, and left for the local library. His father didn’t object instead he told him where to meet up for dinner later.

Finding a quiet table and chairs were few traveled in the reference section of the library, Jerry quickly setup. The whole day Jerry worked on his decryption program and tried to learn more about the laptop Mia gave him. One program he finally learned wasn’t decrypted, but it was a bunch of bank account transaction numbers. Amounts of each electronic transaction weren’t listed and the numbers weren’t consistent in any kind of known order which made Jerry think these were incoming transactions from various banks instead of outgoing transactions from the same bank. Whoever the laptop belonged to received a lot of different bank activity but for what and how much? He was about to cross reference some of the transaction number to figure out which ones belonged to which bank when his phone rang.

He answered it. “What do you want, Dorian?”

“Hello to you too my father kissing cousin… well not my father but you get the gist. Speaking of all things taboo, I’m curious as hell to know what you two darlings have been up to. So….”

“I was wondering why you called me before a month was up.”

“Duh! Gossip makes the world go ’round and I’ve got my Mitchy in suspense. He’s just as eager to hear the latest and greatest drama from the gossip channel.”

“You told your boyfriend!” Jerry nearly yelled before realizing where he was. He glanced around the library as a few eyes turned toward him.

“I share everything with my guy. Including spit and semen. No secrets between us.”

Jerry groaned.

“Tell me, tell me, tell me…” Dorian chanted like a bratty kid hyped up on candy. “Tell me, tell me, tell-“

“Alright!” Jerry began to talk low into the phone just in case someone walked by. As he explained all the nasty things they were doing, Jerry packed up his stuff. It was almost time to meet Philip for dinner. He got up to leave as he finished his tale.

He could hear Dorian whistle through the phone. “Damn cousin, you really are the submissive type in bed. You’re still a grizzly bear outside the bedroom though.”

“He shaved me,” Jerry said rubbing the stubble under his chin.

“What? You let him… No more bigfoot! Now you’re just a giant asshole?”

“Pretty much.”

“Hmmm… Shrek, have you told him you want it up the ass?”


“Why not? Cause you do. I know you do.”

“We’re not having this convo.”



“You want him to force you.”


“You want a fight. You want the struggle. You want him to make you get on your knees and submit.”

“No, I don’t.”

“You want him to force that dick up inside and make you scream.”


“Oh, yes. Yes, yes, yes, yeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssss!” Dorian sang like a tone deaf opera singer — too high pitch and off key.

Jerry had to switch his phone to a different ear as the other side rang.

“And don’t deny it. You liked when he took the bull by the horns. And when I say bull, I mean you. He even pegged it when he said your body is more honest than your lips.” Dorian giggled like an excited school girl. “You, masochist, you. The Giant M wants to be held down and punished.”

“Stop it.”

“How big is he?”


“He’s as tall as you…so is that thing massive? Would it rip apart that sweet virgin ass?”

Jerry shuddered at the thought, because Philip Jr was fucking intimidating. The only reason that thing fit in his mouth, was because Jerry’s mouth was in proportion with the rest of him.

“Your silence says yes! What does he win, Bob?” Dorian said in a game show host voice. “Well, Dorian, that tight little pucker wins a giant-sized butt plug with gobs of lube. Might I suggest you start two sizes smaller and work your way up to ginormous. It will help when he forces his way in. It won’t hurt so much. Stretch those muscles out.”

Jerry actually considered it.

“I doubt you’ll have to push him much once you’re ready for the deed. Especially since he can get hard with you. We men loves us some sex. And if he realizes you’re the hole instead of him…I bet you’ll be screaming each other’s name in not time. I mean seriously screaming because that shit’s going to hurt. Oh, daddy!” Dorian squealed in a girly voice.

Jerry shook his head. “Dorian?”

“You’re going to hang up on me aren’t you?”

Jerry did.

When he arrived at his favorite Mexican spot and sat at the bar where his father was drinking a beer. The handsome man seemed relaxed staring up at one of the televisions over the bar at a soccer game.

“Dorian says hi.”

“How’s he doing?” His father asked looking over at him curiously.

“Crazy as ever.”

“I told you crazy runs in our family.” His father chuckled, though he looked a bit apprehensive. “You and he were always close… How much did you-“

“Everything.” Jerry smirked.

His father’s eyes widened before gulping his beer.

“He was there for me during it all. We don’t have secrets. Do you know about he and Uncle Allen.”

“No. I don’t talk to Allen. What’s going on?”

“Dorian’s dating his best friend. A guy. Totally in love with him.”

His father chuckled for a second shaking his head. “I can imagine Allen isn’t taking it well.” His father smirked, a wicked gleam in his eyes.

“Nope. Dorian doesn’t talk to him. I think Uncle is still trying to convince him he’s not gay, but Dorian would probably rather kill than leave Mitchell.”

“That intense…” His father looked concerned. “Sounds like he inherited our DNA.”

Jerry nodded. “Mitchell’s a good guy and loves him despite Dorian’s antics. The two have always been thick as thieves so I doubt that will ever change.”

“You’ve met him?”

Jerry laughed. “Dorian didn’t give me a choice.”

“You…don’t plan to tell anyone else…about…um…”

“No. Just Dorian. And Dorian, despite being a total nut, won’t blab to anyone but Mitchell. They kept my secret about Gerald so I trust them,” He said watching his father’s uncomfortable slouch as if he were trying to hunch into the counter.

In many regards, his father was a virgin. He’d never been gay. Never been with a man. And definitely not with a son. Jerry wanted to do something to ease the worry he saw in his father, but found it better to let the guy work it out himself. Hopefully, whatever conclusion the man came to, Jerry just hoped…he stayed.

During dinner, Jerry was munching on a taquito, working on his laptop to finish up his assignments emailed to him by his professors, when his father finally broke the silence.

“Do you think they’ll try to expel you permanently from school because of what happened?” His father asked sounding concerned.

“Maybe,” Jerry said not looking up from his computer.

“Even though you were just defending yourself?”

“Fighting on campus is still an issue…and I did hurt Dave pretty bad.” Jerry shrugged, lifting his gaze. “It could’ve been worse. They could’ve catch me with my tongue down my father’s throat.”

“Glitch, that isn’t funny.” His father looked around to make sure no body heard that. The bartender was on the other end of the bar and no one else was close.

“No, but your face is.” Jerry grinned. “The coach and half the team have my back. Hopefully, the school won’t let Dave’s father have his way. But that might be hard since Dave’s family is a big deal. They won’t want the family making things complicated.”

“How much of a big deal are we talking?”

“Big time stock investor.”

“Hmmm…you could also lose your spot on the team.”

“Doesn’t matter. I’ve been considering giving it up for a while now. And I’m thinking of transferring schools. My grades are good enough and my work advanced enough that I can probably get into one of the bigger tech schools on scholarship. So I’ve got to get to work.”

“Wait…you don’t want to play football?”

“Honestly, I only did it to be close to Gerald. It was his thing. But now…I think I need to move a step forward toward what I want to do.” He would never let Gerald go completely, but he needed to stop holding so tight that Jerry couldn’t look himself in the mirror again and admit that what Gerald did was wrong. Baby steps.

“I see…” His father said looking pleased.

“Upset you won’t have a son who plays football, anymore?”

Tilting his head to the side, his father didn’t look the least bit disappointed. If anything, the man looked pleased. “No, I’m glad you’re being you. Honestly, I’d be happier if my son just lets me watch TV with him.”

Dumbfounded, Jerry opened his mouth, desperately finding the words to reply. Then he stopped when the bartender came and took his father’s beer order. Jerry just sat, reveling in the pride his father reflected. He’d never knew how much those words could affect him until he said them. Having his father’s approval…felt fucking fantastic.

“So what school are you leaning toward?” His father cut into his thoughts as the waiter brought his beer.

“Georgia has a good computer science program.” Jerry answered. “Or I could go more north…or California.”

“You need help transferring or money for tuition or moving expenses or…anything, just let me know.”

“I told you what I want from you.” Jerry’s thigh moved until his touched his father’s.

That face grew red. “I swear, Glitch-“

“Drink your beer, old man. I have a program to finish writing.” He went back to his laptop, chuckling.

They sat quietly. His father finished his beer watching the big screen football game. When the check came, his father paid as usual.

Later in the evening, Jerry packed up his stuff when he heard some voices raise in the restaurant. He looked back to see some of the staff looking up at one of the big screen TVs mounted on the wall. It was one of the only screens that showed the local news. The report on the screen mentioned two more bodies were found dead. When he heard the name Alejandro Flores he stiffened. He knew Alejandro. Shocked, Jerry walked to the screen with the rest of the staff and watched as the news reported a possible drug related incident. Alejandro was one of two who were found dead in his penthouse apartment. The other was his suspected lover, Nicholas Richardson.

At first, the name didn’t register with Jerry as the shock of Alejandro’s death washed over him. It didn’t register until they posted a picture of Nick on the screen. The first thought that occurred to Jerry was, Holy hell, Alejandro was gay? Mr. Macho, grabber of women’s asses?

Then Jerry found himself sucking in a pull of air as the other revelation struck him. “Nick?” Dead?

“You knew him,” His father asked stepping up beside him.

Jerry didn’t answer as first. Then the words floated out of his mouth. “Yeah…”

“Friend from school?”

Jerry shook his head absently as he finally turned to look at his father. He opened his mouth but found no words. It just seemed wrong somehow to say, I fucked him behind a night club. And he gave excellent head.

Jerry felt sick all of a sudden. He staggered back to the bar and sat down to catch his breath.

“Glitch?” His father was right beside him, rubbing his shoulders. “Who is Nick?”

“I…He… We went to the same gym.”

“He wasn’t a friend?”

Jerry’s face twisted in pain. “He wanted more. But I didn’t want a relationship.”

His father’s hands stopped moving. “Oh.”

They sat at the counter for a long moment as Jerry just tried to wrap his head around how Nick could just…

Everyone who got involved with him always left or died. It was like a damn curse. That’s why he didn’t like getting close to people. That’s why it was better to be alone forever. Even now, though he didn’t know Nick, there was pain from the loss. He hated the feeling. He absolutely loathed it. Thoughts of his family, the years of pain, the fear of being discovered, and the deaths all crashed in on him again.

Up and leaving the restaurant before he knew what he was doing, Jerry had to get away. He needed to…

“Glitch!” His father grabbed his arm stopping him.

“I…Um…” Jerry tried to scramble for thoughts. Too much emotion threatened to make him crazy. He needed something. Grasping at desperation, Jerry did something that shocked even him.

He pulled Philip to the side and kissed him right there on the street.

His father stiffened at first. Jerry cupped the man’s neck and leaned his body into the kiss, feeling he wanted…needed this. Frantic, he tilted his head slightly to deepen the connection. His father grabbed his wrists as if trying pull him off.

Jerry opened his eyes to plead with him. He pulled back just enough to whisper. “Please…”

“Glitch…” His father looked torn.

“Please…” Jerry leaned his forehead against his father’s.

“I…We…We’re in public, Glitch.” The man whispered.

Jerry squeezed his eyes shut, wishing he didn’t feel anything, nothing. Why couldn’t he cut the emotions out of his very being and just be a shell? It had been his greatest wish for years.

His father took him by the shoulder and pushed him back slightly. Tears began to fill Jerry’s eyes as memories of his former family taunted him. Tilting his head back, he ground his teeth to keep them from falling.

His father moved. Jerry followed absently, but didn’t say a word, fearing he would start begging…for what exactly? The pain to flee? Everything hurt. People always leave me…always…

For a moment, Jerry just let the sounds of the city flood him, drowning out his miserable self. I’m pathetic. He thought as hands led him.

When they got to the apartment, his father took the key from Jerry’s pocket and opened the door.

After the door clicked shut behind them, Jerry robotically went to the kitchen fridge to find something to eat…or drink… He couldn’t tell if he was thirsty, hungry, or just tired.

“Glitch, can we talk?” His father asked.

Jerry didn’t answer as he just stared into the white walls of the refrigerator’s interior.

“Glitch.” His father’s voice called. “Talk to me.”

Compelled by his father’s demand, Jerry opened his mouth. “I’m lost.” Was all he could say.

“Lost how?” He could feel his father coming closer, closing the distance.

Jerry’s skin heated. His groin responded. “Please don’t come over here…in fact just leave.”

“Talk to me. Why do you say you’re lost? You seem more together than most people.”

“Are you blind? Or just stupid?” Jerry snapped. “I want to fuck you! How is that together?”


“Just leave!” Jerry grabbed a bottle of something, turned, and was about to throw it when his father caught his wrist.

“Calm down.”

“Leave!” Jerry roared.

“No!” His father roared back, shutting Jerry up. His father grabbed the other wrist and hemmed Jerry back against the fridge.

Waking up from his shock, Jerry fought back, jerking free. But his father was quicker, blocking Jerry’s fists and keeping Jerry contained against the fridge, limiting his mobility. The old geezer knew what he was doing.

So he tried a new tactic, he licked his father’s lips.

“You just won’t give up will you?” His father shocked him further and grabbed Jerry’s wrists and pinned him back against the freezer door before his pelvis deliberately rubbed against Jerry’s hard groin.

Jerry moaned from the sensation not realizing how hard he was and how close he was to jizzing in his pants.

“You know you can’t resist me…” His father’s leg came up between Jerry’s legs, caressing his thighs, before nudging against his hot dick. “So why fight me?”

Even as he groaned, wanting to come, Jerry struggled, not wanting to admit how far gone he was for the fuck-up.

His father slammed his wrists against the hard surface behind him, demanding Jerry behave.

“It’s like you want to incite me.” He leaned into Jerry. “Picking fights. Saying hateful shit.” The blue in his eyes darkened. “Because you want it rough.”

When that knee ground into Jerry’s covered flesh, he came, bucking against the man who haunted his thoughts.

Coming down from the high, Jerry found his head laying on his father’s shoulder as he leaned his weight on him. A hand comb through Jerry’s mane.

“Glitch,” His father’s voice was gentler even as the next words he spoke weren’t. “I’ve damaged you enough, don’t you think? So, I’m not leaving.” A kiss touched his jaw. “Don’t think you can get rid of me. Either love me. Or hate me. But I’m never leaving you again.” Then those fingers that were tender a moment ago pulled, yanking Jerry’s head back. 

Jerry grunted. 

“And if you try to anger me again,” His father said, calm and yet composed. “It won’t be me who gets fucked.”

Eyes wide, Jerry just stared at the man who didn’t look at all like he was bluffing.

“Now go clean yourself up so we can talk. Ok?”

Jerry nodded, dumbly. “Ok.”

Finally freed, Jerry wobbled to the bathroom, uncertain how to feel…but for the first time, there was a kind of quiet within him.


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