The Wrong Type of Affair

8 Break


8: Break

After practice, Mitchell waited in the locker room for everyone to leave. Dorian lingered for a moment slowly packing and zipping his duffel before shuffling to the exit. He stopped by the door but didn’t look back.

“Bro, if you need me, call,” the guy said, before leaving.

Mitchell watched his friend wondering about that morning once again. Dorian had always been there for him just as he had been there for Dorian. Even now, Dorian had his back and worked to distract Mitchell from his fuck ups. He couldn’t ask for a better friend. Even as close as they were he never considered more with Dorian. Why? It wasn’t because Dorian was straight. Mitchell had crushed on straight guys before. So why had he never considered sex with Dorian?

His friend was cute in a party boy surfer kind of way. He was fun, accepting, and loyal. All Mitchell had to do was pick up his phone and Dorian was there. They were there for each other during both of their parents divorces. During middle school. During the first scary days of high school. During both losing their virginity, Mitchell getting his first guy, and confession being gay.  Mitchell never needed or wanted more from the guy. But now wonder circled his head, making him think thoughts he’d never considered before. And his imagination was making him see things in Dorian that weren’t there before. Fear of ruining a good friendship kept Mitchell grounded. He wouldn’t throw away the best thing in his life on a whim.

Finally picking his pathetic ass up from the locker room bench, he walked to the classroom and found his teacher smiling at him. That smile was so damn charming. The guy stood and smoothed his hands through his brown hair.

“I almost thought you weren’t coming.” He closed in on Mitchell in three long strides and wrapped him in long arms. His lips claimed Mitchell, taking his tongue in deep.

Mitchell allowed it until he felt the guy let go to fumble with Mitchell’s jeans.

Jerking away, Mitchell stepped out of his teacher’s reach and said, “We… I need a break.”

“Why? What did I do?” Mr. Schultz sounded panicked.

“Nothing. You stuck to the plan. Just sex. But I want something else.”

“Something else? What is it? Tell me. I’ll do it!”

Mitchell laughed. “Leave your kids? You’ll do it?”

That face paled. “What you’re asking is…?”

“For a commitment.” A sacrifice. Mitchell understood what George was trying to say. Not only did Mitchell need to sacrifice, but so did Mr. Schultz. “I want to be more than just a sex friend. An affair. I want more. I want loyalty. And honesty.”

“But I thought you just wanted sex. It was only about sex! Now you want me to leave my kids!”

Mitchell frowned at the outrage he was seeing. What happened to all the words of love and devotion? Mitchell’s heart sank from the rejection even as he knew it needed to happen. Expected it to happen. It reflected how stupid he had been from the beginning. It was time to climb out of his own ass and face his miserable self. He was tired of being pathetic. “No. I wouldn’t respect you if you left your kids. I’ve seen it before. It’s not pretty. So no, I don’t want that. I’m saying I was wrong for pulling you into my…weakness. I saw a man with a crush like mine and wanted… a kindred spirit. Someone to understand…” He remembered all their nights together and all the rushed, rough sex. It was never about more than sex to his teacher. It was so glaringly obvious to him now. His teacher always fucked him, with only words of love. No slow sensual love making or meet ups outside of school. He always fucked Mitchell like it was the last time, so they could easily walk away from each other.

In the beginning, Mitchell used him as a distractions to get away from his pain, but only to end up feeling worse. “It was my fault.” Was all he could say. “Goodbye, Mr. Schultz. See you in class tomorrow.”

“Mitch. Maybe we can talk about this more?” His teacher reached out to tenderly caress his cheek. And Mitchell laughed, because while his touches and kisses were kind, the sex never was.

Time for a harsh wake up call for both of them. “Talk?” Mitchell stepped back from the touch. “How would this convo go? Are you planning to tell your wife you are leaving for a seventeen-year-old? Or are you going to tell your kids your leaving them because you lost your job for sleeping with a student?”

The guy’s eyes grew huge with fear.

“It’s time we both face reality and the truth. It was just sex. That’s all it’s ever been for you with me and that teacher last year?”

The guy’s face paled. Busted!

“You said I’m your first guy…but you never said I was your first affair,” Mitchell said, leaving to grab his bag from the locker room. He never even told me to call him by his first name...

That night he walked part of the way home before he called Dorian. He went into a gas station five miles from the school and stopped to grab something to drink and eat.

He sat outside the store on the curb and opened his gas station sandwich. He bit into it and looked out into the passing evening traffic. His heart hurt from the mess he had created. He wasn’t built for casual sex and no strings attached. He realized that then.

He ate until a tear traveled down his face. He so desperately wanted to forget everything that he dragged another into his scheme, and then tried to force the guy to want something even Mitchell didn’t want himself. “Stupid.” He mumbled wiping his face. He swallowed the wad in his mouth and watched the black Civic pull up to the parking spot next to where he sat.

Dorian got out bundled in his down coat and a knit beanie. With his hands shoved into his pockets, he looked at Mitchell blankly.

Mitchell held up Dorian’s favorite orange cream soda and a large bag of sour cream and onion chips. Dorian grinned a boyish expression before taking a seat beside him. They ate in silence watching the cars come and go. Snow started to fall. When they both finished their food, Mitchell pulled out a twenty dollar bill and said, “Gas.”

Dorian laughed and took it, long fingers brushed over Mitchell’s lingering longer than necessary. Mitchell looked over into those pretty blue eyes wondering if he imagined it.

Dorian quickly turned his head and hopped up. “I’ll fill up the tank. Then we can bounce before we become popsicles. I bet I’d taste like an orange cream soda one.”

Mitchell sat for a moment, checking out his friend’s ass before his view was obstructed by the car he got into. Slowly he rose taking his bag with him. He threw his stuff into the car, then himself. After Dorian backed the car up to a tank and got out of the car, Mitchell stared out the window at his friend filling the car. A familiar expression played over Dorian face while he stared off into the distance. An expression that told Mitchell that Dorian worried about something.

What was going on with his friend? He felt stupid for not knowing. He’d been so wrapped up in his own idiotic life he didn’t even notice his friend was concerned. Was he worried about Mitchell or something else? If he agonized over Mitchell, it was time he took those worries away.

When Dorian got into the car, Mitchell started up with some small talk. First they chatted about the snow and if it would fall all night. Then they talked about football.

“Hey Mitch,” Dorian stopped in the middle of a conversation about how much the SAT’s sucked.


“You and the teach…”

“I’m done. I was stupid. I got too attached. You were right, I shouldn’t have done more than one night. Just sex.”

“No. You were right. I shouldn’t have pushed, I apologize, Bro. Forgive me?”

“Nothing to forgive.”

“So you really liked him?”

“I…” Mitchell thought about it and said, “Don’t know. Maybe, and not really.” Mitchell couldn’t explain it but he felt he need to for Dorian. “When I first went to him, I turned off the lights. I wanted it to be easier. But each time we did it since, the lights were always off. It was always easy for him. Even the sex was…” Mitchell laughed. “It wasn’t that good, it was just intense. It helped me forget. But in the end it was like eating a cheap hamburger when you really wanted a porterhouse. I excepted a substitute ignoring what I really needed… what I wanted.”

“What do you want?” Dorian asked pulling up to Mitchell’s house. Mitchell looked at the empty two story house with no lights on. It always felt lonely when his mother was gone on business. But he was glad it was empty now. He needed to just enjoy his own brain.

“George gave me time off to think about it. So let me get back to you on that,” Mitchell said getting out of the car. He reached in to grab his bag and looked over at Dorian.

“Thank you, Bats.”

“For what? Fucking up your life?” His friend quirked a smile hands gripping the steering wheel.

“For being there.”

“Dude, that’s easy. You make it easy.”

Their eyes locked for a moment before Dorian broke the weird tension. “Fucking A, you’re letting the cold in on purpose! Frostbite is alive and well and haunts my ass daily. Hey, this isn’t funny. I’m pale enough as it is!”

Mitchell just laughed closing the door and shutting out his quirky friend’s rant.


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